Numinous History

How did the Numinous Circle begin?

Rev. Jopie Boeke initiated a young adult group to meet on Sundays at the Kensington Church. Five UUs in their late 20's came fairly regularly. The meetings had little structure. Jopie participated. A few months later, she suggested beginning the meetings with a check-in. One member, Cathy, heard of an east coast band called the Numinous Fools. She suggested the name the Numinous Circle; the name stuck. The Circle decided to move its meeting place to Starr King School, a UU seminary. With a location much closer to downtown Berkeley and Oakland, other young adults in the East Bay could attend. In the fall of '92, Cynthia, a seminarian, offered to participate and contribute leadership. With her leadership, the Numinous Circle started planning for a couple months at a time. Cynthia facilitated most of the meetings.

How did we develop a shared leadership model?

The group stumbled on its current model of shared leadership. By January '92, Cynthia was very pregnant. She encouraged others to facilitate meetings. Members were reluctant. When a couple of newer members facilitated, the Circle responded well. It was clear that facilitating a meeting was easy, fun, and creative. Soon, anyone that had a specific interest volunteered to facilitate a meeting. The Circle thrived. Several people invested time and emotional intimacy in the group. The Circle held a retreat to clarify the group's raison d'etre, its goals, and how to proceed without any formally designated member. In the fall of '93, the Numinous Circle was assigned a seminarian by First Church. Several members resented an older adult assuming that the Circle needed external leadership and direction. The Circle was clear: if the seminarian wished to participate and contribute as any other member, s/he was welcome to do so. The seminarian left the Circle. In the last two years, two members entered seminary. One has remained active. This person participates and contributes significantly to the group. The Circle often looks to this person for leadership. During the spring, this person didn't attend the Circle. Other long term members suffered extenuating circumstances that prevented them from offering stability. Attendance starting dropping off. Occasionally the facilitator didn't show; often was unprepared. There was talk of meeting only once a month during the summer. The seminarian returned to the circle, offered to facilitate as much as necessary, and plugged for keeping the weekly meeting. Lots of new energy entered the group. Again the Circle thrived, again perpetuating the shared leadership model.

What would you find when you visited the Numinous Circle the first time?

Wednesday nights at 7:30 p.m., between 7 and 22 people gathered in one of the rooms at Starr King School for the Ministry. Women and men ranging from ages 19 to 38 chat, exchange lively greeting, and get into a circle. Some people sit in chairs; others take to the floor; one or two may sit on zafus. Some people take off their shoes. One person asks for everybody's attention. Often the gathering begins with a moment of silence, a song, or a reading--something that brings everybody's attention to the circle. Sometimes this formal beginning is skipped and the group begins check-in. During check-in, one by one around the circle, each person speaks. Most people share joys and concerns; many tell what happened to them that week; others speak of insights gained, disappointments, and renewed hopes. People speak of their jobs, relationships, parents, anger, fears, and disappointments. Laughter liberally sprinkles check-in. Some people go on and on; others tell stories that captivate the others. When the last person speaks, announcements are made: people singing in a choral event; anybody interested in help planning a retreat; volunteers needed for a church homeless project; a party next Saturday. When announcements finish, the circle breaks for 10-15 minutes. People mill around to speak with one another, use the restroom, and hang out in the kitchen to get water or buy snacks. Perhaps as late as 9:00pm, the circle gathers for its activity. One of the members facilitates a discussion, a game, a talent night, a music sharing evening, or a presentation. Its almost 10 o'clock when the circle ends the evening. The closing ritual has everyone stand in a circle holding hands. A song, a few words, a couple of jokes, or simply a silence is shared.

Why Check-in is the defining characteristic of the Numinous Circle?

Check-in gives each person the opportunity to express themselves and listen to each other without interruption. Joys and sorrows are shared. The stories fill us with the range of emotions from dread to delight. The unencumbered sharing of check-in allows people to truly be with the speaker. When trauma afflicts one of our lives, the Circle can listen without judgment, without criticism. The depth of sharing brings out our common humanity. We know we all suffer in our unique circumstances. We all know that tremendous joy waits for us to claim it forth with one another. Check-in takes precedent over the evening activity. Sometimes check-in lasts more than two hours. If one person is having an especially rough time, the Circle will likely take time to invite discussion if this person so wishes. Human relationships are of utmost important. The Circle sees itself as a support group. The connections between the members emerge from a common struggle with our life journeys and the dreams that we find we share.

What are favorite evening programs?

Any activity that gives people a greater facility with connecting with others or knowing themselves. Activities on spirituality: spiritual friendship and listening exercises, truth mandala ritual, prayer workshop, and discussions on who are our spiritual teachers, the Gospel according to John, the Gnostic Gospels, and the power of myths. Book studies: The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck, Keeping the Love You Find by Harville Hendricks, Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse, How Can I Help? by Ram Dass and Paul Gorman, and The Power of Myth by Joseph Campbell. Numinous Circle activities seek to explore spirituality, personal and community growth, and encourage self- expression in various ways. Programs range from discussions to games, talent nights to creative writing activities. Favorite evening programs have included poetry and journal readings, bring you favorite music, creative writing activities, (one which turned into a thoughtful intimate conversation on masturbation), angel cards, comic relief, dream analysis, coloring with pastels, and discussions ranging from the Gospel according to John to the top ten characteristics we look for in a potential parner, from spiritual friendship to the meaning of money.

What happens behind the scenes to make the Circle run smoothly?

When the Circle creates a new schedule, the activities for the next three or four months are determined. In addition to the activities, a facilitator is designated for each meeting--the same person who runs the activity. The Circle encourages all members to participate and so the facilitator person rotates to different people. The facilitator is responsible for the opening moment before check-in, introducing the format of the meeting to any visitors, beginning check-in, asking for announcements, and running the activity. Schedule planning takes place at a Wednesday night meeting to get as many people involved. Once we have three or four months planned, someone takes the responsibility to create a Numinous Circle flyer with the new schedule. Another person keeps a database for the addresses of everyone in the Circle. Copies of the flyer reaches about 70 people. The schedule is also put on the UU page of the Internet, into the PCD-UUYAN newsletter, and UUCB's calendar. We have two designated contact people for both interested members and members of the church. Their phone numbers go on all Numinous Circle descriptions. Several members on their own initiative bring Ben & Jerry's, homemade truffles, cookies, candles, and other goodies and worship materials. Usually every person's birthday is remembered with some type of sweets. Outside the Wednesday night meetings, the Numinous Circle gathers for potlucks, parties, retreats, and church projects. Two to three times a year, retreats are planned. From Friday night to Sunday morning, members socialize, relax, play games, perform rituals, play music, sing songs. Two to three times a year, the Circle prepared lunch for the church. Once a month, members of the Numinous Circle sold coffee and goodies after the Sunday morning church service.

Affiliation with The Unitarian Universalist Church of Berkeley

The Numinous Circle was initially tight with UUCB because the minister participated. When the location moved and as the shared leadership model developed, the Numinous Circle relished the newly found autonomy. For a year, the group had almost no connection with the church with the exception of being reimbursed for the cost of mailing and using the church cabin for retreats. About half of the members identified as UU. In the spring of '94, the Numinous Circle accepted the invitation to participate in Sunday services. First the Circle prepared a homily on love for the Valentine's Day Service. In May '94, the Circle organized an entire Sunday worship service. The young adults felt this was their chance to express to the older generations what they found meaningful. The theme of the service was "The Importance of Telling Our Stories." Instead of a sermon, the Circle opted for a presentation that demonstrated the power of sharing personal stories of joys, struggles, painful moments, the uncertainty of life, and the wide open horizon of our journeys. Seven members participated in this collaborative effort that required lots of time and energy. Several others attended. the effect was what you'd expect when someone really shares from the heart. This was the turning point. The Circle now felt connected to the rest of the church. Members gladly served lunch a few times a year, promoted the Circle at the Sunday Service, and became more visible within the church. In July '95, the Numinous Circle organized another service. The theme was "Young Adults Coming Alive as UUs." Six people participated but this time the preparation was largely done by one person. The sermon was one person's testimony and insights, using stories from the heart. Both the sermon and the service made a big impression on both the congregation and several young adults that happened to be there. Several new people joined the Circle. With two of them active in the church, the Circle was all the more connected to the church. The Circle contributed to the Ministerial Search Process by hosting one of the search committee members. The Circle agreed to serve coffee and cookies once a month at the Sunday Service. The Church often found in the Circle volunteers for its community service projects.

Publicity

Originally people found out about the Circle by word of mouth or the church newsletter. The ministers were good at letting young adults who visited church know about the Circle. Visibility in church makes a big difference. When a young adult meets another young person at a church such as UUCB, the generational similarity makes an impact. The Circle's biggest growth spurt occurred after the Circle's second worship service. During the last year, a number of people have learned about the Circle through the internet. Several people have visited soon after moving to Berkeley. Some of them have stayed.